What doesn't kill us...

Only makes us stronger.

I cannot tell you how tired I am of hearing this. Seriously. I know it is meant to be a pep talk. Meant to be uplifting. But really? It makes me want to smack you. Sorry. Just being honest. I won't smack you because I don't believe in hitting nice people but I might want to.

I don't want to be stronger. Just because I happen to be going through a really rough spot and haven't keeled over from stress does not mean I'm relishing the "getting stronger" part. I am probably the biggest 'Everything Happens for a Reason' person you will EVER meet. But right now? I can't make sense of my Daddy's death. Someday I'm sure I will see some sort of silver lining - but right now stupid cliches and "God doesn't give us more than we can handle," "What doesn't kill us makes us stronger" and "Everything happens for a reason" are lost on me.

Totally not picking on anyone here. No one knows what to say. Especially when I find myself just blurting out, "My dad just died" to a complete stranger. I've got to stop doing that.

Now to kind of garbage dump in this post.

Selah? AWESOME. Front row seats because I got there two hours early. They were fantastic as ever. Me? Total puddle. Because they sing songs with such meaning I started crying and pretty much didn't stop for the second half of the concert. At the very end they gave a sneak peek (or sneak listen I guess) of a new song. Oh Em Gee. Fab.u.lous. I also stayed after to meet Allan, Todd and Amy. Turned into a puddle again. I'm sure they were very impressed.

It turns out it was black shirt night! Glad I wore mine :D

Gigi came home on Sunday night. I am so glad to have her home. Now I feel like we can start to prepare for school (Kindergarten EEK) and start our 'new normal.' I'm only having one minor freakout a day about school so that's good. We got her teachers name and have Open House next week. She's ready. Her supplies are labeled and in her new backpack. I will be ready eventually too.

The other exciting news? We got our playset!! Crappy picture through the window because I'm a princess today and it's hot. And humid. And the mosquitos might carry me away. Some very nice gentleman were here all afternoon setting it up. I don't think they have much blood left with all the bites they left with.

Immediately after they finished Gigi found her neighborhood friends and had them all over. She came and told me, "Mama it feels like a PARTY back there." That makes my heart smile. It is a bit sad because this playset is from my Mama and Daddy. They both wanted her to be able to have something to play on in the backyard. Unfortunately my Daddy didn't get to help pick it out or build it - but Gigi knows that her Papa and Grandma got her playset for her.

In other exciting news...I have a flower in my yard. If you know me you know this is VERY exciting news. I don't grow things. My cats and my child cry if they are hungry or thirsty. Plants don't do that. So I usually kill them quickly. The gal I bought my house from was a BIG gardener. Most of her plants have made it - but of course the ONE that she asked the neighbor about when she saw her was the hibiscus. Honestly? The hibiscus WAS dead. Not growing. No signs of life. After my dad's memorial? FLOWERS. Ferreals. I don't think I can attribute it to my dad because that doesn't seem like him, but it does give me hope that someday I could maybe grow something. Here are the flowers...

So Grandma Ann - if you happen to see this. I did NOT kill the hibiscus. And if these are not in fact hibiscus flowers? Don't tell me. Just let me think they are. I'm pretty proud of my red flowers :D